Dr. Luann Linquist… as seen on OPRAH
Men and women cheat on their spouses at an alarming rate. Research shows that between 52 percent and 73 percent of people are in a relationship with a cheater. How do you find out if you are one of them? Do you know or suspect you are, but can't prove it? Cyber Lies, by John Lucich, is your expert guide to get access to hidden and, until now, out of reach technical information that reveals what you need to know.
Through more than twenty years of counseling victims of affairs, and as the author of SECRET LOVERS . . . How to Cope, I discovered the major driver of the increase in cheating/affairs is the ease that technology offers. It provides not only temptation - which has always been there in many forms - but also instant gratification: "Just take a peek; click here; someone to talk to; someone is here waiting for you now." There also is the constant barrage of spam that simply encourages you to "try it, you'll like it." It's very enticing and seductive.
I have helped hundreds of people through the pain and suffering caused by lies and secrets. Many times, after much resistance and even more lies to keep their secrets, the cheater is relieved when their deceit is finally out in the open. This is a vulnerable time for a relationship because emotions are very high, swinging between guilt, anger, hurt, and fear of loss.
But there is hope. An affair does not have to ruin a good relationship. You can and will get through this. Couples I've worked with are a testament to the human ability to heal the hurts, stay together, and even improve their relationships.
The first step is to find the truth. This is why reading Cyber Lies is so important: Mr. Lucich helps you find the truth. You become informed sooner, rather than later. Your knowledge helps eliminate the days, months, and years of the drama cycle (Suspicion-Hurt-Deception) that weigh heavily on any relationship.
Yes, secret, private, supposedly "no-big-deal" time spent in chat rooms, Instant-Messaging (IM), frequent e-mails, quickie cell calls, and visits to cheating and dating Internet websites are as serious a threat to your relationship as a face-to-face, belly-to-belly affair.
Whether it is just a fling, an ongoing affair, sexual addiction, or lack of moral compass, Lucich - with easy-to-use, no-nonsense tools and straightforward talk - gives you a way to take charge. No longer will you be on the receiving end of a cheater's poor choices. I am highly impressed with Cyber Lies. John Lucich is a law enforcement veteran, college professor, and internationally recognized computer forensic expert. He knows the basis of the technology behind computers and cell phones, which offer a fertile environment for spouses who are inclined to cheat.
If you are the innocent spouse/partner, Cyber Lies arms you with the information you need to gain a better understanding of technology, the methods to protect yourself, and the how-tos of accessing the technological devices to obtain the data to make crucial, important, and difficult decisions.
Cyber Lies isn't a training manual for learning how to be a computer forensic expert, nor is it a handbook for repairing your marriage. Mr. Lucich is your guide to understanding how you can take advantage of computer technology and cell phones to end the cheat-by -deceit drama.
Even if you are not technically advanced, all you need is determination to help yourself and your lawyers in discovering what has been deleted from computer files or the name and address connected to the cell phone number you found written on a Post-itŪ note. Cyber Lies even helps you solve the mystery of keystrokes from the late-night IM chat going on downstairs when your spouse told you, "We were just working late."
Many faithful spouses cannot afford to hire a computer forensic expert. And, sometimes there simply isn't time to find one. John Lucich brings this forensic expertise to you in Cyber Lies. He wrote this book to help you get started NOW by accessing, imaging, and reviewing computer information that can help you learn the reality of your situation.
You can almost hear Lucich's confident voice and discerning advice when Cyber Lies is open to "Steps For Imaging a Hard Drive," and your monitor is displaying the hidden, and until-now-secret "lovey-dovey" emails from "firstname.lastname@example.org" to "email@example.com."